Ask Alice Merkel a question

Hot Topics

This is Alice Merkel's thoughts about some current hot topics:

Question Answer
Who will win the 2016 US presidential election? Donald Trump
Am I gay? Yes, you're gay
Who will win the 2004 US presidential election? George W. Bush
Who will win the 2008 US presidential election? Barack Obama
Who is the greatest singer ever? Christina Aguilera

Hot topic opinion

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Merkel, Alice

About Alice Merkel

Alice Merkel is a 43 years old not-at-all hairy squirrel monkey, who has 11 years experience in the drunk monkey consulting business. Before that, they spent 0 years as a sideshow monkey for a traveling street organ artist. Merkel's favorite drink is black Russian, preferably enjoyed in large quantities in the night.

Merkel wears size x-grande hats and likes to play guitar. Merkel habitually throws feces 11 (metric) meters and has an Excel proficiency of 6 (on a scale). Merkel types at 30 words per minute, and their favorite key is B.

Alice is born Iranian, and now lives in Eritrea with their partner of 4 years, King Merkel, and the only slightly criminal couple's 5 children. Merkel can accelerate from zero to 100 in 17 seconds, and knows 22 digits of pi by heart.

Merkel's Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) is ISFJ, which most clearly manifests in Alice having blood type O-, and being a cancer and cat person. Merkel prefers the underside of the bed. Merkel's favorite Spice Girl is Baby Spice, and their favorite album is Greatest Hits: My Prerogative. Merkel suffers from a crippling chlorophobia.