This is Bubbles Wagner's thoughts about some current hot topics:
|What color is the dress?||White and gold|
|Can I get a witness?||Yes you do|
|Is it time for a LFP?||Yes|
|Evolution or intelligent design?||Evolution|
Have smartphones destroyed an entire generation?
Bubbles Wagner is a 15 years old quite hairy rhesus macaque, who has 0 years experience in the drunk monkey consulting business. Before that, they spent 4 years as a sideshow monkey for a traveling street organ artist. Wagner's favorite drink is rum, preferably enjoyed in large quantities in the afternoon.
Wagner wears size grande hats and likes to play flute. Wagner habitually throws feces 11 (metric) meters and has an Excel proficiency of 14 (on a scale). Wagner types at 310 words per minute, and their favorite key is E.
Bubbles is born Ceylonese, and now lives in Malawi with their partner of one year, Precious Wagner, and the only slightly criminal couple's 3 children. Wagner can accelerate from zero to 100 in 6 seconds, and knows 38 digits of pi by heart.
Wagner's Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) is INTP, which most clearly manifests in Bubbles having blood type A-, and being a scorpio and cat person. Wagner prefers the left side of the bed. Wagner's favorite Spice Girl is Ginger Spice, and their favorite album is Britney & Kevin: Chaotic. Wagner suffers from a mild cyberphobia.